So, I am still in good ol' Seguin. My friends that are here were all taking finals today, but i finished mine yesterday. I was here still because i had some unfinished business to tend to aka waiting for a tow truck to come take one of my best friends away.
i would not say i normally cling tightly to all of my belongings, but a couple of my stuffed animals and my car, Fred, i have clung to like flea on a dog. There is something secure and comfortable about these things to me. Mainly my car.
I have tried to pin point what it is that makes me so attached to this car that no longer can get me from point A to point B, but nothing has seemed to justify the extreme loss i feel when i think about it. There are so many reasons to love my car, but i feel like i am invested in this car as though it were a person. and a person, it is not.
I have been through so much with that car. in high school and my first year of college it was a get away. I would always take the longest way home or to church that i could find and if i wasnt ready to get out get i would just go around the block a few times. maybe take an adventure to see streets i hadn't been on and stuff like that. i would sit in that car for hours with my friends after JROTC practices and just talk. hours upon hours of just idling and talking.
I got that car my sophomore year of high school, so it has been with me for about six years or so. i know its weird traits like the whistling noise the AC makes and that the trunk door was replaced and then i broke it again. the AC is the fastest i have ever felt. the stereo was my whole first pay check from Quizznos. it got me all the way to lubbock and back several times.
it is so hard for me to let go of what has always been. and that car was always there. mainly because it is a car and does not have a choice. it is where ever i put it. i never had to worry about if it was too busy or had something else to be doing. that car was always right there. and it has always been reliable.
the transmission is going out now and that pretty much totals it out since how old it is. and even though i have this new car (which is still incredibly awesome) i am sad that in the morning Fred will be gone. i am not all emotionally attached to the new car yet and i dont know if i will be or not. it feels like a car. but Fred felt like a person. a person that never lets you down. which is silly to think since the new car is always going to be exactly where i put it as well...but oh well. love just dont make sense now does it?